OK, kids, do we all have parents’ permissions?
SAT scores?
Good
Show starts soon
Check did you bring your equipment
Headphones? Cyber glasses? Gloves?
Good
(Billy, stop pulling Kellsie’s hair right now!)
Is everyone ready?
Good
Please, fasten your seat belts
Be sure that you are at least 2 inches away from the person next to you
Medical staff with adrenaline shots is in the room, in case of emergency
Simulation of life starts in 3, 2, 1…
… How are you???
We’re so excited to have you here, on GVSU
You’ve made right choice!
We will shape your lives, your professions and your societies
Small campus tour will start soon
I hope you are all excited as I am!
I didn’t hear you, are you excited?
Are you?
That’s better!
On your left side you can see our cafeterias:
Sandwich Castle, Fresh Pizza and Burger Brothers;
Then there are also buildings Gym, Gym II, Gym III and Jesus Fan Store
On your right side there are
Amusement Center “Virgin Mary”, Center for Correct Thinking,
Wall with Ten Commandments and a lake
Hey you!
Yes, you litlte guy
C’mon, don’t be shy
Come here
You’re emo, aren’t you
We’re so excited that you’re emo!
We completely respect your emo rights!
Can I just remove a bit of that make up
Yup, that’s good
And that hair, I’ll cut also just a bit
OK, maybe a bit more than a bit
And that t-shirt with two red skulls look a bit dirrty
Here, I have a great GVSU hoodie for you
Look how pretty little emo are you now
And just please be quiet while you’re killing yourself in the toilet
We don’t want to receive complaints from your roommates, don’t we
(Quick mental note to all our cyber visitors – simulation of life ends in 4 years if you are full time student, an if you’re on Exchange we hope that you will enjoy your semester or two and that you have signed all 4571 necessary papers)
